WINTERPILLS (S/T)


(SELF-

TITLED)

2005.

A BENEDICTION

all the sad boys come home with you
drape you in garlands and sing their sad songs to you
pour all their stories like rain through you
all the sad boys come home with you.

all the green children pine for you
they learned all your secrets and made up your mind for you
although they were unkind to you
all the green children pine for you.

all the pale grey stars shine through you
your body fell prey to the transparent mind of you
all blue ghosts search for signs of you
all the pale grey stars shine through you.

LAUGHING

I started losing you
About the time you told me everybody knew
I fell under the strain
And through the rear-view mirror watched you
Circle 'round the drain

I go back to all the places I've known
I knock hard but no one's ever at home
Why does every brilliant color I'm shown
Wanna bleed to grey?

And I can't hear you laughing anymore.
I can't hear you laughing.

I tried to find our flat
But god would never ever let us have the keys to that
I tried to buy a house
But the deal she offered me would mean
You'd have to call me Faust

I go back to all the places I've known
I knock hard but no one's ever at home
Why does every brilliant color I'm shown
Wanna bleed to grey?

And I can't hear you laughing anymore.
I can't hear you laughing.

Cranky

All I know is that I’m true
To every single one of you
The best that I know how to do
I’m lost
I’m lost

Cranky is friend of mine
She puts away a glass of wine
Faster than the columbine
Falls off
In frost

So tell me cranky
What do I do
What do I do
There’s miles more heartache
Yet to go through.
Yet to go through

How do you get rid of love
When its painted on you like a glove
And you’re really not deserving of
Its grace

Cranky’s got somewhere to go
Probably leaving with the coming snow
Somewhere south of Idaho
I’ll miss
Her face

So tell me cranky
What do I do
What do I do
There’s miles more heartache
Yet to go through.
Yet to go through

cranky is friend of mine
She puts away a glass of wine
Faster than the columbine
Falls off
In frost

Threshing Machine

We took a picture together
We held the camera in front of us
Your arm was cutting right into the frame
Your smile was for both of us

Something about the way we looked that day
Caught in the act of trying to look away
From the sight of our hands caught in this threshing machine
Do you feel like you’ve seen anything,
Ever, at all?

We took a walk on the dykes
And walked by the proscenium arches
Paused at the mouth of a rabbit hole
Stared down and wondered how far did it go

Something about the way we talked that day
Caught in the act of trying to look away
From the sight of our hands caught in this threshing machine
Do you feel like you’ve felt anything,
Ever, at all?

Try to imagine us in a house
Try to imagine us in a car
Try to imagine us staying alive
And not just hiding away in this bar

Something about the way you looked today
Caught in the act of trying to look away
From the sight of your hands caught in this threshing machine
Do you feel like you’ve done anything,
Ever, at all?
Do you feel like you’ve said anything,
Ever, at all?

Want the Want

a whispered curse under his breath
a whispered prayer over a death
a sunrise blotted out by cloud
a mother sleeping by the shroud

a poison word that’s never said.
a simple frame above the bed.
a poison word will not deceive.
you don’t believe what you believe.

you want the want.
you want the want
(if it doesn’t kill you first
it might just drive you mad)

the vision doesn’t disappoint
the ghost is lighting up a joint
the fickle crowd has gone to sleep
you’re ready now to take the leap

you want the want.
you want the want.
you want the want.
you want the want.
(if it doesn’t kill you first
it might just drive you mad)

Pills for Sara

Vials of bright forgetting powders
Reds and yellows, sweets and sours,
Curled around a scented pillow
Biting hard and crushing flowers

I went down to sugartown
To try and get some pills for Sara,
They said her prescription’s over
there’ll be no refills for Sara

She’s in pain
And I’m her main man

Down to 7th, down to A street,
I made all the rounds for Sara,
Vicodin and oxycontin
My love knows no bounds for Sara

My man gave me something tasty
Vials of bright forgetting powders
Biting hard and crushing flowers
Sleeping through my superpowers

Hours of sleeping, hours of searching
Dreaming that she’d found a way out
She was always so impatient
She would never wait the day out

I went down to sugartown
To try and find some pills for Sara,
They said her prescription’s over
There’ll be no refills for Sara

She’s in pain
And I’m her main man

Vials of bright forgetting powders
Reds and yellows, sweets and sours,
Curled around a scented pillow
Biting hard and crushing flowers

Found Weekend

familar light
pillow’s wet
much confided and cried and repaid

too much room
in this room
all the furniture’s taken away

found weekend
you will live forever

apple’s still
crisp on the shelf
pack of duck sauce
a glimpse of a self

light goes off
underground
we won’t surface
until we are found

found weekend
you will live forever
you will live forever
you will live forever
you will live forever

Portrait

the photographer’s impatient
as the train pulls out of the station,
and you’re heading further south
than i thought you’d ever go.

the streets are filling up with snow,
the ice floe has no place to go
so i’m opening my doors
and telling everyone i know.

i can’t pose for this portrait without you.
the light is fading fast on what is true.
i can’t pose for this portrait without you.
the families in the line behind us are trying to get through.
there’s honey in the chemicals.

you hide so well that nothing shows,
you can’t lock eyes with one who knows,
and every sheet that comes out white
reminds me of that night.

if you were here i’d look complete,
the cameras wouldn’t have to cheat,
something in the photo bath
would make us all so sweet.

i can’t pose for this portrait without you.
the light is fading fast on what is true.
i can’t pose for this portrait without you.
the families in the line behind us are trying to get through.
there’s honey in the chemicals.

your car wheel’s spinning in a ditch,
your father called you one cold bitch,
he said he would’ve hit you
but he didn’t have the strength.

my house is filling up with smoke,
i’m getting high on jack and coke,
the kitchen pipes are frozen
and your world is at arm’s length.

i can’t pose for this portrait without you.
the light is fading fast on what is true.
i can’t pose for this portrait without you.
the families in the line behind us are trying to get through.
there’s honey in the chemicals.

honey in the chemicals.
honey in the chemicals.
honey in the chemicals.
honey in the chemicals.

Letter To A Friend In Jail

can you see this hotel from your cell?
can you sleep and do they feed you well?
it’s been months since i’ve had any word.
on the only tape of you i have your speech is slurred.

here’s some news for you from the outside:
everyone’s gone blind from trying to hide.
the vintage arcade’s been hauled away,
it looks more and more like a prison every day.

ah, letter to a friend in jail.

the warden can’t forgive our midnight kiss.
he doesn’t know it’s me that’s sending this.
there’s a file baked into this tart,
but it won’t cut through the cell bars in your heart.

you didn’t have to confess all of it,
you could’ve held on to the costly bits.
of your crime i still have not been swayed.
i think you’re the only one who’s been betrayed.

ah, letter to a friend in jail.

if you want me to i’ll wait for you.
if you ask me to i’ll wait for you.
if you don’t i’ll walk my silent mile.
i’m so damaged by what came out at the trial.

ah, letter to a friend in jail.
letter to a friend in jail.

Looking Down

am i doing this right?
you oughta know.
should i put up a fight?
you oughta know.

when you came in did they pass out your gold car?
give you map and show you where you are?
point us out to you on the golden sphere of this star?

i feel you looking down, looking down on my love.
i feel you looking down, looking down on my love.

should i head for the hills?
you oughta know.
should i tear up these bills?
you oughta know.

when you came in did they take you to the bar?
give you a drink and say that you’d come far?
point us out to you on the golden sphere of this star?

i feel you looking down, looking down on my love.
i feel you looking down, looking down on my love.
i feel you looking down, looking down on my love.
i feel you looking down, looking down on my love.